Friday the 14Th

I grew up in a time before being politically correct was the norm. We didn't get trophies just for showing up and come Valentines day our teachers didn't require that every non-Jehovah's witness in class get a valentine. We spent a day or two elaborately decorating shoe-boxes with stickers and little lace doilies in anticipation of them being overstuffed with messages of admiration come Valentines Day. That was never my experience. One year in particular the teacher thought it would be a good idea to have each child individually pass out their cards and/or candy. Kid after kid passed me by...and the popular girl next to me with the straight hair and no freckles had so many that she asked me if she could use my box since I wasn't gonna need it. That set the tone folks, every year V-day brought knots to my stomach and being a hopeless romantic even back then, I always thought "this year will be different'. To add insult to injury, my parents didn't celebrate V-day either, they both believed that it's better to show your love EVERY day than to overspend one day a year to make up for the rest. Well yeah, of course it is but when you're 8 you want crappy cards and lots of candy! My Mimi however, loved Valentines day, any excuse to decorate and shower my brother and I with goodies, she was in!  Mimi was my Valentine every year. Without her I might have murdered Cupid years ago. Middle school brought "candy gram" HELL to my world. Just like the empty shoe box of my early years except my lack of "love" was on public display for the whole school to see. Unlike today it wasn't socially acceptable for girls to give each other Candy grams as sign of friendship or solidarity,  although some of my friends and I still did. No, in middle school your worth was measured by how many BOYS sent you Candy grams and how popular those boys were. Mean Girls were alive and well in 1985 and I got a Candy gram that year from the boy I had a crush on and I was overjoyed, validated even. Until I went up to him to say thanks and realized from the chorus of snickers behind me that it wasn't actually from him. I call those girls Satan's Triplets and the Candy gram was joke on me from them. All this being said you'll understand why I'm less than fond of this over commercialized, bullshit holiday. Flash forward 20 years or so and I closed escrow on my first home with my then fiancé on February 14th, the "holiday" was looking up. Soon I  become a mom and having toddlers around makes everything more fun. I turned into my Mimi, any excuse to decorate and spoil my kids. I decided I'd reclaim the holiday and I did. My married Valentines days were a mixed bag. Some great, and some as awful as elementary school. Today, I've been single for 4 V-Day's...but you know what? It doesn't sting like it did when I was 8, or 12 or even 22. It's the day before half price chocolate day which is a MUCH better "holiday" if you ask me. I also have the joy of seeing my son scouring Pinterest for a gift idea for his girlfriend, then making it with his own two hands just like the Valentine cards he'd make me when he was little. He does things like this often for his girl,..,.not just on the day Hallmark says he should. Ya know what that means? That all the pain I suffered was for a purpose. I was able to teach my children to be thoughtful, considerate and a little bit corny. If you find yourself single on Friday, with no cards in your shoe box, don't sweat it.....your life is no worse than it was on Thursday. Cheers to you all...single or not. And yeah..Happy Valentines Day.